its not that i dont know God is here, looking out for me and stuff. sometimes i just feel so overwhelmed with everything else that i dont give him the one on one time he needs with me...i am scared to go to church...not because i am scared of religion..i dont like the judging, condemning, hypocricy and socialite attitudes that are now associated with them..at times i wonder if its ok to just sit home and worship with Joel Osteen and pray and thats it...i love God and i know he has saved me many times....he's called to me when i was near my end...but i begged him...'who would care for the child he gave me...who would do it like i do...and he saved me...he saved me for two reasons...1.. because he loves me...2. because he knows i love my daughter to my soul....but sometimes i feel like praying and telling others about him is not enough....but its the fact that i am not satisfied that bothers me..is this a sign for me to do more...chandge my lifestyle and do more...i wonder sometimes...i know my life would not be possible without Him...i just want to know how i can do more to let God know i love him and he is my one and only creator and savior....
